2. Start work on the idea with the energetic enthusiasm of a hyperactive child. This is going to be THE ONE!

3. Mild panic as a blank screen floats up into view like the vengeful ghost of a family member I murdered for their inheritance.

4. Check Social Media sites.

5. Reply to a famous person’s amusing tweet.

6. Tweet either something I overheard or a geeky pop culture reference combined with a horrible pun.

7. Refresh Twitter feed to see if the famous person replied or RT’ed me. Nope.

8. Oh, yeah! G+! I keep forgetting to check that.

9. Look at the blank page. dribble a couple of sentences from my fingers.

10. Text girlfriend.

11.Refresh Twitter to see if anyone noticed my HLARIOUS pun. Nope.

12. Feel guilty about having the idea in the first place because I’ve decided that I don’t have the talent or discipline to pull it off.

13. Check Facebook. Scroll, scroll, hide user, scroll, block app, block app, hide user, decline invite, decline group, scroll, read stuff that people crossposted to Twitter, wonder why I bother with Facebook at all.

14. Shake it off.

15. Order more coffee. Steel myself for some serious fucking work.

16. This is it. I’m going to HEY! I HAVEN’T SEEN YOU IN AGES! HAVE A SEAT!

17. Okay, now it’s time to work. Right after this pee break.

18. Refresh Twitter. Maybe make another pun.

19. Throw some angry words down on paper, typing so hard I may just shatter the keyboard.

20. Get phone call.  Wrong number.

21. Refresh Twitter. More puns.

22. Become overwhelmed by feelings of self-loathing and inadequacy, giving up on this terrible idea.

23. Wonder why all of the choices in my life led to me sitting here, hating my brain.

24. Have a good idea. Go to Step 2.

Add a few more IKRs per conversation until it gets to the point where you’re able to reply to anything he says with “I KNOW, RIGHT?” Then your journey to pure conversational romance will be complete.

Here’s a link to the podcast!

Actually, we’re a little curious (and a bit concerned) about the pills embedded in the candy. We welcome anyone who can to translate this part of the label:

Also, enjoy this note recently slipped under the door of Shaun’s former roommate.

And here is the episode.

Now, we promised we wouldn’t put a link up to that video we talked about– hell, we feel terrible just for spending all that time talking about it. Instead, enjoy various videos of adorable things:

ADORABLE!!!
Also, here’s this Doctor Who minisode, which is actually dreadfully delightful.

And the podcast!

There’s also a fair amount of this (as usual):

And some talk about this:

Oh, and at the appropriate moment, watch this. Don’t watch it otherwise. There are very few appropriate moments to watch this:

Okay, let the tuning commence !

It screened last weekend at a Doctor Who convention, and got a lovely response.  Hopefully we’ll get a sequel.  Go give a listen to Radio Free Skaro.  It’s a great Doctor Who podcast.
Eric

I performed this nugget at “Say Wha?! Readings of Deliciously Rotten Writing” several months ago, and now I give it to you.  Enjoy.

And no, I am not a milkman.

Believe you me,   I’m making the movie in my head as we speak.  Aren’t we all?  Here’s my dream casting for the key people:

Connor MacLeod

This is a tough one.  Christopher Lambert immortalized the role in 1986 (see what I did there? That’s a play on words.  Go back and read it again.  Pretty good).  We need someone young, rugged, and able to handle himself in a fight.  I have the perfect candidate:  Jasper Hale, AKA Jackson Rathbone.

Connor MacLeod - 2012?

“The Twilight Saga: Eclipse” showed the world that Rathbone can do different accents and that he understands what a flashback is.  “The Last Airbender” showcased his ability to grow long hair.  And both of those movies are proof that his fighting abilities are second to none.  He has the haunted eyes of an immortal, and he looks good no matter the colour of his hair.  Although… we haven’t seen him as a ginger.  Wouldn’t that be something?

Ginger Jasper

The Kurgan

A movie is only as good as its villain, which is why we need more than an actor.  We need a force of nature.

You are TEARING ME APART, QUICKENING!

This one is a no-brainer.  Is there anyone else who can be as threatening and as charming as Tommy Wiseau?  We don’t know how old he is, and we don’t know where he’s from.  Just like a real immortal.

As moved as I was by the character interaction in The Twilight Saga, I do think Wiseau should write his own dialogue.  He is the only person alive who understands the shapes made by his mouth.

Ramirez

Yesh. I'm from Shpain.

Who could take the place of Sean Connery as Ramirez?  For the last decade or so, the “Sean Connery” role in movies has been played by Liam Neeson, but I don’t think Neeson has the magical quality that gave Ramirez his charm.  For that, we have to look at where Connery was as an actor in the mid-1980s.  Here we had a man in his 50s at the nadir of his stardom.  And let’s not forget his strategy for arguing with women:

Is there anyone who fits that description in 2011?  Yes.  Yes there is.

A year after Connery did the original “Highlander,” he won an Oscar for “The Untouchables.”  Perhaps this could be a stepping stone for Gibson’s comeback.

The best thing about Mel Gibson is his gift for comedy.  I don’t know about you, but one of the biggest laughs I’ve ever had was the end of “Braveheart.”  It was amazing how he gave a three hour movie a punch line like that.  Well done, sir.

The Music

There is only one band in the last 20 years who has matched the operatic intensity of Queen.  I really think this could be Creed’s moment.  Are they still together? Where can I find that information?

The Director

Once again, I can only think of one name:  M. Night Shyamalan.

Think how glorious that would be!  A director of Shyamalan’s skill would add a sense of mystery to the duels.  He’s a master at putting the camera in the general vicinity of movement.  He’s the Tyrannosaurus Rex of directors, and that just what this movie needs.  He can film a fight scene and make it look like nothing you’ve ever seen.  Especially if you’re familiar with things like fight scenes.  Remember that great, sweeping shot of MacLeod and The Kurgan fighting in the warehouse?  Shyamalan could do the same thing, and he’d only have to use the top right corner of the screen.  That’s just how good he is.  I don’t want to spoil the second film for anyone, but there is a fantastic built-in twist for Shyamalan to throw in at the last second: Zeist.

And do I even have to mention that “Highlander” is the reason 3D was invented by James Cameron in 2009?  I didn’t think so.

I really hope someone in Hollywood uses these suggestions so we can have the greatest film of all time ever.  Let’s applaud the movie industry for their forward thinking on a Highlander remake.  It’s proof that there doesn’t have to be “only one.”

It's a kind of Magic.

We will post this trailer for the movie Fear though, in which you can witness some of the points put forward by our guest Lauren McGibbon.

We will also post a link to the “Say Wha..?” event on February 16th which will feature both Lauren and Eric.

And of course a link to the episode. Enjoy!